Back to School

Number 1 son leaves for his senior year in college tomorrow. This year he finally has his own car so he can drive himself down. For three years we have driven him and helped him move into his dorm. I always make his bed and leave a card with a little cash in it under his pillow.

His car is a Honda Civic, pretty small and he has a lot of stuff to take down. He's going to be living in an apartment for the first time although it's on campus. Several times we have commented to him that he will not get everything in his car, we'll need to come with him to bring the overflow. He always sort of blows off the idea saying things like, "that's going to take extra gas or I'll get it all in or I have to come home for a weekend in Sept. to work at the hospital, I can take the rest then."

Tonight I told him that he needs to let us know, Sean has to take the day off from work and we have to make arrangements to get Number 2 to work. He comes over and sits on the couch with some heavy sighs. "What's the matter?" I ask. Welllllll... Finally I just ask him, "do you not want us to come down with you tomorrow? Do you not want your parents to help you move in? Do you think no one else's parents will be there?" "I won't be mad, honestly I don't care if we come or not." "Yes, I don't want you to come" he says looking at me sheepishly.

I purposely said I didn't care and of course I wouldn't be mad but I did want to come down. As I said, we've done it for the last three years. After he told me that he left to go out for the last time with some friends. I couldn't help it, I cried. Not really because he didn't want us to come but for the reason that my son is really growing up, becoming independent, separating from his parents. I guess maybe it's a mom thing. I have never been one of the parents that can't wait for their child to go off to school. I enjoy him immensely. He's smart, funny and opinionated. I miss him when he's gone.

While I'm sitting there all teary, Number 2 comes over and gives me a big hug and tells me, "Mom, you still have me, I'm not going anywhere for a whole year!" which in turn makes me cry even more. Times flies, to think that we have these kids for only 18-21 years, then we have to turn them loose to live their own lives and hope we did a good job.

sniff, sniff